Women’s choices in the face of male conditioning — social and financial
Feeling or not feeling well is related to the awareness of oppression suffered. Before knowing what a woman is in this “male world” women blindly follow pre-conceived symmetrical patterns in the male mind.
Before having lived and assisted experiences, people generally do not know what they really want or like regardless of their gender. However, when we talk about women's decisions, we are faced with a line of choice that creates too much fallacious freedom.
Essentially female choices are influenced by automatic charging over the conventionally accepted beauty standard, motherhood, and hypotheses where the woman's voice is silenced by the dominant power structure - in terms of sex and gender. This influence is also linked to ethnographic, family patterns, personal beliefs, and a predominant factor: conditioning as conventions of a society created by men, that is, as female choices are not only influenced by the environment in which they live but also - in a way indirect and direct - by the male will.
The thought domination structure is passed from generation to generation, creating behaviors considered socially acceptable to that culture. When there is no awareness of social oppression in terms of freedom of choice, we only survive in the face of the chaos of pre-established options, thus making the being without consciousness a prisoner of his own chance as a result of bureaucratic or limited options.
It can be said that men feel superior to women when they realize that in fact, they have the power to limit or hinder their freedom of choice. The condition applied to women has a history intrinsically linked to the power structure of patriarchy, where women have always been seen as helpers (Genesis 2:18). Is the logic that representativeness is masculine something to be researched, after all, since when was it agreed that the man was, in fact, the head of the house? And why did women accept and surrender to this position, accepting their consolation prize and second place? How did women's thought formation take place? How do male wishes shape women's thinking?
Historically, the man is known as the provider. The initial relationship that is understood from this comes from the Paleolithic man who went out hunting while the woman took care of the offspring in the caves, since then, some years have passed, but the thought of sexual division of labor remains mainly based on motherhood. Without going deeply into biological determinisms, we can only mention that pregnancy is a causal externality that is part of the range of pre-established options for women regardless of their choice, a factor that limits their freedom of development since the beginning of human existence.
Motherhood is a limiting issue for women. All a woman's choices are turned to her part of herself for long years and, perhaps, to the end of her life. For men, the relationship with fatherhood takes other levels, such as the responsibility for provision agreed in most societies. Such responsibility can also be characterized as conditioning, even oppression, but it is worth remembering that this same responsibility is accompanied by authority, representation in the decisions of the family nucleus, mastery of political, labor, and entertainment speech of a culture. the responsibility of the man as the provider also justifies many cases of abuse for which a woman is subject to accept, especially when the man and the woman have children.
Socially, motherhood does not seem to be a choice. The social convention linked to the religious view on life leads young people towards the establishment of a family nucleus of biological children. It can be said that the process of accepting motherhood as a predetermined destination for all women starts from childhood in toys and games. While the boy gets a remote control cart the girl gets a pink doll that cries. What is the fun of playing with something that cries, after all? What is the fun of playing with cliques and stoves? Why is this the female task since before she was aware of what it is to be a woman?
The right of women to come and go and consume is closely conditioned by the will and good humor of men in general. Even walking head-on in the street amid a group of men talking can be embarrassing. I remember very well when I was taught by my mother at the age of six that, when passing on the street among gathered men, I should bow my head and not stare at any of them. Six years. At the age of eight, I learned that I couldn't stare at any car passing on the street, not even to know the make or model (after all, because I would want to know something about a man like that, wouldn't I?), Because otherwise they honked and they looked at me with lust. Eight years. It is impossible to enjoy a healthy childhood as a woman. At the age of ten, we learned to wash dishes, sweep the floor, wipe, and dust. We learned to cook easy foods when we were eleven or twelve years old and at 14 years old we are able to take care - without the presence of adults - of a home and other children in peace.
So why are there 50-year-old men who can't cook? Why are there kids who don't know how to do their own laundry?
I tell you why:
Because one day they had a mother, possibly a wife, maybe daughters or maids, and finally, they will always have a nurse or caregiver to do these women's services. The sexual division of labor is perpetuated in the culture of the society in a way that starts to be considered as a natural and conventionally good order. Who has never heard an older woman criticizing a younger woman for not performing well in household chores? The phrase is accompanied by a “why when you get married…”. Unfortunately, these women are unable to change the perspective of the sexual division of conventional labor, where two adults constitute a home but the only one performs domestic services because the other is resting from productive work economically.
Well then I ask you:
And when the woman also works outside? Why then is there no division in household chores? Why is your income considered - usually in the lower classes - just an aid? Why are women born in 1950 opening bank accounts only after they are old to receive their pension?
What about the right to consume, since when do we need men to order from us in the restaurant? Since when do we need to be paid for products or services for us? Why do we accept this? Why do women need men?
So, finally, I answer them:
Women don't need men.
But they still don't know that, so we live as we do.
Meanwhile, women work, study, survive earning 30% ¹ less in net pay, occupying only 15% ² of leadership positions, and in at least 20% ³ of cases, raising children without assistance. In addition to all this, you still need to be aware of your weight, appearance, house cleaning, food preparation, home administration, wage work, the morning after pill, thrombosis, and femicide.
At the end of all this thinking, I conclude: feeling or not feeling well is relative to your acquired knowledge, the level of acceptance and tolerance to the world around you, and how long it will take you to let the effervescence of your discovery overflow with changes of attitude.
²Women in the Boardroom — a global perspective (2017).
³https://www1.folha.uol.com.br/fsp/cotidian/ff1008200815.htm
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